Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Checking into Rehab

*Deep Breath*

This isn't something I've shared with (m)any people, let alone post this on the internet for the world to see (ie. a world of both of you).  There is an element of ease while writing this, as I don't have to look at anyone in the eye, and admit I have a problem.  But, that still doesn't mean this is easy.  It takes a real man (as opposed to a fake one) to admit he has a problem, and needs to seek professional help.

Finally, after way too long, I've checked myself into Rehab.

Life was simply becoming too much without it anymore.  I was constantly waking up miserable, and people around me said that I seemed on edge all the time (and of course, my reaction was "F#%k off").  "They don't know the pain I'm going through right now" I'd tell myself, and shun them off.  I'd get concerned looks, but I could care less.  For those that really cared, would ask me to talk about my problems.  "Talk about my problems?"  I'd think, "What, is that for guys don't eat salads who don't wear spandex?".  The lack of summer here in (coastal) San Diego was really depressing me.  I simply couldn't take it.

I needed a therapist, so I checked into Rehab United to set myself straight.

Physical therapy people - I miss riding my damn bike! (and running too)

Ok, enough drama (most of the above is not actually true).  Seriously speaking, I started physical therapy at Rehab United last week, and things are going as well as they could be after a week.  Apparently, the extremely tight hips I have may be causing the misalignment. We'll see in due time.  I am excited to be working with these people, as I've heard nothing but great things about them and what they do.

Also, as head coach, I decided it was time to get back to running and biking (screw that swimming crap for now!), and took my roadie out on the roads on Laguna mountain this past Saturday (more on that in a bit)!  It was freaking great.  All knee issues are no longer, and the endorphins were flowing.  One thing I certainly "learned" - I love riding my bike.  I'm sure you're thinking "Uh duh dude, you've done RAAM twice".  But seriously, even though I have nothing on the calendar, I definitely missed turning the pedals.  Very rarely in the past five years have I ridden a bike without training for something.  Now I do it for (gasp) fun!  I realized the other day that if there was one workout I enjoy the most, it's those 4-5 hour bike rides - especially when I'm FIT.  Assuming PT goes well, I should hopefully be only a few months away from ripping up the roads.

The time off was actually good for me (as Evan pointed out) mentally.  I was totally bummed about not being to do Cozumel, but admittedly, the break from rushing from bed-to-workout-to-work-to-workout-back-to-work-then-maybe-to-a-3rd-workout was certainly welcomed.

I'm refreshed and STOKED!

ps- Chuckie V has finally been updating his blog.  I don't know about you, but there is a sense of calmness and "all that is right with the world" when he graces us with his words.

pps- Thanks for all the positives comments from my last blog post.

ppps- good little jam right here:


Tawnee said...

Your life reminds me of mine. Everything you said, I'm like, "yup, uh huh, me too." Crazy. Glad to hear you're back at it, and having fun no less.

'Roo said...

Fight on buddy! Assume you're going to the C.V. branch of RU? Looks like there are a few Trojans around there. They also apparently like Gary Gray (very much), which is a good sign.

Ben's transcanada said...

Thank GOD for chuckie.
and I totally agree about the slump when you can't ride. i just toured for 3 months, and my parents met me at the end, they then TOOK AWAY MY BIKE so i could rest. that was hell. 36 hours a week to nothing feels baaad.
glad to hear you're enjoying riding

Ulyana said...

oh gosh, that title scared me, lol.

So happy you are happy!

I'm starting PT next week - excited, too! :-D

goSonja said...

you totally freaked me out for a second there, I was like "Oh dear, what is going on". I'm glad your getting some rehab! I betcha it will help mucho! When your all better you need to come to CO and train with chuckster and some of us, I would love to meet you in person!